Harry: Jeff or Kate (one looks the part, the other can do the accent)
3 Sweathogs are sitting in chairs facing as a dorky kid in glasses wearing a black robe enters.
HARRY: Okay, Class, settle down now….it has been several years since I graduated from Hogwarts, but I assure you, if you pay attention to my lecture, you will make your house proud.
(they all laugh at him)
HARRY: Excuse me! You! Yes you….
HARRY: pay attention!
HARRY: That’s it! No Quiddich for you!
HORSHACK: ooooh! Ooooh! Oooh!
HARRY: Yes, Horshack?
HORSHACK: (stands) Misssster Potter…..Even though the sorting hat said I am a sweathog, I feel I most resemble your own griffindor! (he then chortles) HEH HEH HEH.
HARRY: Thank you…now, Sit down please!
(just then, Epstein swaggers in)
HARRY: Epstein! You’re late to my Potions Pondering class!
EPSTEIN: It’s okay, Mr.Pott-ier….I gotta note!
HARRY: Enuff with your notes!
(the class then erupts into character cliches)
MUSIC: Kotter theme song
VO: Gabe Radcliff stars in Welcome Back Potter! Coming Soon to a Phantom Sheep Show near you!